Dating Break

 Getting out of a relationship and learning to live on your own and depend just on yourself is always hard and it definitely takes some getting used to. It is therefore unavoidable to think that you need to jump into a new relationship so that you avoid rocking the boat too much and continue living the way you have been used to - with someone by your  side.. But once the shock and grief are gone, you come to realise that living on your own and getting on with your life as an individual, as opposed to a couple, is actually quite refreshing and enjoyable. 

 As soon as I got out of my relationship with Serge (see The Heartbreak), I was in a hurry to start dating again. I was so used to being with someone, to spending a good 3 nights with someone by my side and plan every weekend with them, that I just didn't know how to do it on my own anymore. And I decided that I wouldn't have to - I would get into a new relationship ASAP and stop spending weekends on my own and waking up every Saturday morning lost. Of course my friends are always there, but it's not like I ever lost touch with them even when I was with Serge in the first place. So I jumped back into the dating game. I tried to date my rebound - and even though he was a nice guy, we are just two completely different people so that didn't work. And then I became a serial dater, dating a different guy every two days, a good few of them making it to second dates and only a handful to third dates. The same old boring routine of chit-chatting and getting to know each other over the same questions started: "Where are you from?", "What do you do?", "Do you have any siblings?", blah blah blah.. And then one Saturday morning, after yet another boring and unsurprising Friday night date, I woke up, glanced over at the empty side of the bed next to me and couldn't help but wonder: "Is the fear of waking up to this, day after day, enough to make me continue serial dating, when I just simply can't find the energy or will to do it anymore?"... and even worse: "will someone ever be good enough for a relationship?"

And then I decided right then and there that I just couldn't keep doing this anymore. Nothing was wrong with the guys and the dates weren't bad... I just couldn't do it anymore. I was in a relationship for more than a year and gave all I could to one person and I just didn't have anything more to give. It's not that the guys weren't good enough. I just didn't want to go through all that again... not yet anyway. It wasn't them, it was me. And not only did I not need to jump into another relationship, subconsciously I actually didn't even want to.Otherwise I would have stuck to dating a couple of the guys that were good enough and pursue it. I had to date me for a while. And I did just that. I came to terms with the fact that it's ok not to be in a relationship and I started enjoying it. I stopped feeling helpless when I didn't make my plans with anyone during the weekends and once I did that I realised that it was actually refreshing. I embraced being alone and did more things for myself and gradually I learnt how to live on my own again and make my own plans. And I don't need to date anyone... it's fine if I don't want to. 

Will this change? Probably yes, but maybe not for quite a while. I think I got to a point where, for the time being, I have nothing more to give to anyone. Maybe next time I should learn to keep a piece of me just for myself, so that I don't find myself in a situation where I have nothing left to go on with when it's over. But for now, I'm content with having learnt that it's fine not to want to date anyone and it's fine to want to just be by yourself... for as long as you want. Because at the end of the day, this is the most important relationship you will ever have. And who knows, maybe I will meet someone during this phase that will just swipe me off my feet and I will forget everything and fall in love all over again..
But I'd like to keep my feet firmly on the ground and reality has taught me that no one will come knocking on my door to do that. 

Did you ever find yourself in a situation where you simply just don't want to date anyone? How did you get back to dating after a relationship was over? Comment and let me know!

Dating Advice To My Younger Self

It is undeniable that we only learn from our mistakes. If you can’t say ‘been there, done that – never again!’, then you probably don’t know first hand what it feels like to make one mistake after the other and taking an oath never to do it again because it just hurts too much. But looking back at the countless failures and mistakes made through the years, I couldn’t help but wonder: How much do I know now that I didn’t know back then? And would it make a difference if someone had told me this before, or would I just go and make my own mistakes anyway?  Chances are, I would probably go ahead and make the same mistakes, just because I’m stubborn and never listen to anyone. But if I could actually talk to my younger self, then I would definitely have lots to tell me. And for those of you out there that wonder what we do wrong and what lessons we need to learn, here’s a list of the most important ones: 

1. More is Less – Stop overdressing and stop wearing three layers of make-up just to impress a guy. It just doesn’t work like that. The most beautiful look is the natural one. No one said go out in sweatpants, but keep your outfit simple and comfortable and your makeup natural. No guy ever said: “She looked amazing with three layers of foundation on!”. And if they did say that, trust me, it was no compliment!

 2.  Be Confident – The sexiest thing on a woman is confidence. Wear a smile instead of high heels and believe in yourself. Walk down the street and look straight ahead, not at your feet. Believe in your strengths and embrace your weaknesses. Have a positive outlook and killer attitude. Red lipstick won’t make up for it!
 3. You deserve more than you think you do – so many times I settled for less than I was worth, and I probably will do it a few more before I learn. We simply don’t think that we are worth a lot so we just settle for what we get. So many of us just settle and get comfortable in a less than ideal situation, just because we feel like there’s nothing better out there. Newsflash: there is! And you are worth it! (note: L’Oréal did not sponsor me for this!). If he made you cry, he’s not worth your tears – so get up and get out of there. You’ll find something better.

 4. If you fancy him, go get him – don’t play hard to get, it’s not attractive and it’s a waste of time and energy. If you like the guy, just tell him. The games are just tiring and pointless. Don’t be shy – just tell him. At the end of the day, if he doesn’t feel the same then you’d rather know sooner rather than later so you can move on. Afterall, nothing  ventured nothing gained!     
 5. If you are not a priority from the beginning, you will never be – I had to find this out in the very hard way. I stuck around Matt for years waiting for him his girlfriend and make me his priority (see Will he ever leave hisgirlfriend for you?). And surprise surprise – it never happened! Don’t waste as many years as I did, life’s too short. Find someone who will make you their priority.

 6. A big age difference will catch up on you – It’s all fun and games dating older men – the charm, the experience, the life lessons. But it’s almost inevitable not to get attached (see How much difference does a 20-year age difference really make?). And more often than not, you two will have different goals and priorities in life – or the very least, different time spans. And you will get hurt.

 7. Trust your gut feeling – This is something we tend to ignore a lot of the time. The night before Serge broke up with me, I recall myself having a drink with Sarah and saying to her “I don’t know why but for some reason I feel something unsettling. Nothing happened, it’s just a gut feeling”. I almost immediately dismissed it and tried not to think about it. If your gut feeling tells you that something is wrong, then don’t waste any time dismissing it. Look into it – because almost certainly there is something wrong.
8. If he’s too good looking, he’s probably not good in bed - Admittedly this is a vain one. And it is not based on a deep philosophy or theory. It’s almost like an observation I made over the years. If they are too good looking, they never had to look for sex – it just always happened. So they tend to rely too much on their good looks and not skills. So more often than not, they are not the best lovers.
9. There’ no Prince Charming – And no he won’t come to rescue you on his white horse. Learn to rescue yourself! And I cannot emphasize this enough! Stop looking for the perfect guy, he doesn’t exist. And the sooner you realize this, the faster you can start looking for something real. Look for someone to love with all his flaws and imperfections. Find someone with all its negative traits and decide whether you can leave with them or not – that’s the real thing!

10. Don’t expect anyone to love you, if you don’t learn to love yourself first – if you are not happy in your own skin and you are not happy with yourself – why would anyone else be? If don’t love who you are, how do you expect anyone else to do it? No one will do it for you. Learn to love yourself, because that’s the most important relationship you will have for your whole life. All else will just fall into place.

There you have it – an honest conversation that I would have with the younger me, telling her all the lessons I have learnt and all the things she should know before she gets her heart broken over and over again – but she won’t listen to me, she’s too stubborn and she’ll go ahead and get hurt anyway.

What would you say to your younger self? What dating advice would you give to a younger version of you before you go ahead and get hurt? 

Starting Over... Yet Again

Break-ups are traumatic. They take everything you have, they take a piece of your heart and you are left back to square one. They leave you empty, broken-hearted and alone. But this is not a post to remind anyone how a break-up or a broken heart feels (that was the purpose of the last one, see TheHeartbreak). This article is to remind everyone that there is a way to move on. And hopefully through my experience some of you, feeling lost right now, may actually find their way around and start standing on their feet again.

 It took me about two weeks after my break-up to hit rock bottom. I felt sorry for myself, cried myself to sleep for nights on-end, felt lost and alone and I was convinced that there was no way out of it. I knew that after everything that happened, I had hit rock bottom. And when that happens, there is nowhere to go but up. So I woke up one morning and made a decision: I could either stay in that state and feel sorry for myself, lock myself in that mindset and be miserable, or I could make a conscious decision to be happy. It was around that time that I realized how much happiness is actually a conscious decision. Tough times are going to come, for everyone. But you can either put your pieces slowly back together and try to move on or you can just stay there. It was only then that I realized how you can change your put of view on things, just by wanting to.

Pampering Yourself
 So I decided to take it day by day. I woke up every morning and started being positive. I made a conscious effort to smile more. I made a conscious effort to talk to the people around me more and try and stop alienating myself from everyone and everything. And then I started treating myself right, slowly but surely. I joined the gym again and took out all my frustration and anger every afternoon there. And it worked miracles! I started eating more healthily and tried to drink and smoke less. And then I started throwing money at myself. I went shopping and bought new clothes, I moved houses and booked the most expensive facial at the best beauty salon. I was essentially pampering a damaged ego and the more money I threw at it, the more validating it felt. And it worked! Needless to say I was left penniless last month, but it worked.

Loving yourself
 And whilst taking care of the outside was enjoyable, I knew I needed to take care of the inside as well. That’s when I made effort to come to peace with myself. I gradually realized that I spent a good amount of time loving and caring for someone that didn’t do the same in return. So it was about to time I loved me and cared for me. I didn’t regret anything, but realized that I can’t blame myself for everything. Instead, I felt proud of myself. I knew I was honest and did the best I could in a relationship that just didn’t work out. And I had to stop blaming myself for the fact that it didn’t work out. And then I let of all the resentment and anger towards my ex go. Holding onto harsh feelings would have hurt no one but me. I stopped wishing him a life on unhappiness and misery. I have better things to occupy my mind with – like how to succeed in everything I want. I started yoga again and it helped me calm down and be more positive. And day by day it got easier and easier. And I have to put less and less effort these days.

 Naturally, I also had the cliché reaction to a break-up: I rebounded. I briefly dated a guy I met online for a while. We had a nice time, but I’m in no state to take anything seriously or invest in anyone but myself. But hot revenge sex always works… at least for a little while.

And with a couple weeks’ progress and boosted ego I pushed my boundaries and decided to invite my ex out for drinks. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea I ever had, but it made me realize that I owned my break-up and showed me that I did everything right. It might have set me a couple of steps back and poured salt on some fresh wounds, but it was worth it.

Don’t get me wrong, none of this works like a magic wand. It takes effort and there will be a lot of going back and forth in your head. Give it time and effort though, and it will work slowly but gradually. It doesn’t heal you forever. It is my personal belief that a break-up wound always remains open, but with time and effort you numb it and learn to live with what’s left of you. Six weeks later, it still takes effort, but not as much anymore. In a way it comes naturally. As soon as I realized that my happiness was my decision, I knew I had to take it. And now I’m in a new flat, following a new diet (most days) and having a new mind set (almost every day). I will still cry myself to sleep some nights and feel my bed empty, but they are fewer and fewer. And it is only natural. I started embracing it now. It is only natural to grieve after a break-up. But there is nothing to hold you back from moving on besides yourself!

Have you been through a traumatic break-up? How did you move on? 

The Heartbreak

I usually aim at writing every post with something new that I learnt after every dating experience. However, I want to make this article slightly different – this one is for everyone out there that had their hearts broken recently and can’t shake the one thought that torments them every waking moment: “I feel so alone… I’m going through this alone”. You are not – so many of us are going or have gone through it, and know exactly how it feels. And hopefully this post will make some difference – it won’t saw the pieces of your heart back together and it won’t bring him back – but maybe, just maybe, you’ll realise that you are not going through this alone. So maybe for tonight, it might ease the pain a bit.

 Serge decided to break-up with me on a Friday afternoon. I went to his place after work, to spend the weekend at his place, like every weekend. He had been thinking about it all week, so the minute I got in, he made some small talk with me and then said in a serious tone “We need to talk”. I knew right there and then what was coming. My break up with Serge was a sudden but expected one – we are two people at two very different stages of our lives (see How much difference doesa 20 year age difference really make?). Needless to say that the rest 3 days are a blur in my head due to the massive influx of emotions that overwhelmed me – and due to the immense quantity of alcohol I consumed. If it was coming out of a cheesy chick flick, at that moment I would say that I literally heard my heart cracking. But it’s not true. I once read that a heartbreak wasn’t after a cheesy break-up story – but after a biological phenomenon. Your body mimics the symptoms of a heart attack – hence the name. So all I remember is a loud ringing in my ears, shortness of breath and a feeling of not being able to move. I wish I could say that I cried and shouted and did everything that you would think would happen in a movie break up. But I didn’t. I was too much in shock to even process the thought. So before it all hit me (I knew it would, eventually), I decided to pick up my things and head out. I vaguely recall him telling me that I had my things in his bedroom and me replying that I was in no state to pick up anything. So I left.

 That night I naturally decided to get drunk. What I remember is a haze of tears, anger, feeling of betrayal, and denial.  I spent hours staring at a blank wall, lost in my thoughts, or crying with every little detail. I’m not sure how much I cried or for what, but I remember feeling that I would never be able to get over that. My emotions were bigger than me – they were bigger than my will to fight for anything and they were bigger than my inner strength. I felt like I lost the ground beneath my feet. The most intense feeling that I remember feeling is that of not belonging anywhere – not belonging in my best friend’s arms, who was desperately trying to console me, not belonging with anyone around me besides him, not belonging in my friend’s bed who kindly shared with me and held me until I felt asleep. It was a constant feeling of not being supposed to be anywhere but with him.

 The first couple of nights I woke up in the middle of the night at least 5 times looking for him, realizing that he’s not there and breaking into tears until I was so exhausted that I had to go back to sleep. I hated waking up – and I know that’s the hardest part for everyone – because it felt like a slap all over again. It all came rushing back to me and once again I felt overwhelmed – it was the realisation that it wasn’t a dream, it was all real! It was easy and peaceful being blissfully asleep, but then I woke up and had to deal with it all over again, like it was the first time. You somehow drag yourself during the days and settle in your feeling of misery, but you absolutely dread the minute you are going to sleep, because you hate waking up and feeling everything all over again.

 I’m not going to lie and say I was the bigger person and didn’t call him – I did. I called and cried and screamed and asked him to reconsider. I insulted him when he didn’t and we spoke for hours that got us nowhere. Looking back would I have called him again? Probably - I needed to get off my chest all the things that I couldn’t when he broke up with me. I used to cry with every little thing that reminded me of him – and it was everything! The breakfast we shared on Saturday mornings, the TV shows that we both enjoyed watching, the lazy Sundays that we spent, and so on. So it’s like your heart breaks over and over again just by getting through the day. You expect to see them somewhere, you expect your phone to ring – you run to it every time it rings and get pissed off that it’s not him. The first few days following a break-up, every breath you take makes your whole body ache… but you are not alone, and you are not the only one going through it.

The person that actually helped in easing the intense feeling of loneliness is Eva, a colleague of mine, who had been through this before and knew exactly how it felt even before I said anything. A couple of weeks later, at a house party, I happened to meet an 18-year old boy who was going through his first break-up. I knew how it felt and I knew what would help – so I opened up to him. I hated making myself say everything all over again, I hated making myself feel it all over again. But I knew what would help, and if it was going to help him even for one hour, I was more than willing. So I talked to him, and told him everything he was feeling before he even said it himself. And to my surprise he teared up and hugged me, and I knew that it was all worth it.

So you are not alone. I know how it feels – and it’s not exactly the same for everyone, but it’s along the same lines. This article is not meant to show how I started getting over it and what helped – I will do this in the next one – this one is to let every broken hearted person out there know that they are not alone. And this helps. At least a little, tiny bit.

When Tinder Gets In the Middle

 One of the most common questions, if not the most common one, that every woman wonders, in every relationship, is “is he cheating on me?”, or “is he thinking of cheating on me?” or even “will he cheat on me at some point”? And no matter how you phrase it, the ultimate question, behind every woman’s suspicion, is the same: “Is there something that he wants or needs that he’s not getting from me? Am I good enough?”.  Of course it’s obvious that behind such questions, there is always self-doubt… and as much as we hate to admit it, all of us (or definitely the good majority of women) wonder this every now and then in our relationships.

 One of the things that I liked from the very beginning with my relationship with Serge, was the honesty. It’s probably the first relationship that buried those questions so far at the back of my mind, that I had almost forgotten their existence. He never gave me any reason to doubt him and he made it crystal clear from the very beginning how much he detested cheating. And so my mind was put to rest… Until one day I had reason to doubt everything. While spending one lazy afternoon in Serge’s bed reading a book, while he was downstairs watching a movie, I heard a notification on his phone. I hadn’t noticed until then, that his phone was charging right next to me, with him nowhere to be seen. It didn’t even cross my mind to go through his phone or even see who texted him, but the minute I turned my head towards the pages of my book again, I realized that it wasn’t a text message. It was a Tinder notification. And suddenly I was furious. I’m not one to pry, I wouldn’t dare open the message; but that didn’t stop me from heading downstairs and snapping at him. He didn’t even sweat it, he laughed and merely said with great ease “Tinder is still on my phone? I completely forgot I had it!” And just like that, he locked his phone and put it on the table next to him. He did it so skilfully that I thought to myself ”how silly of me to think that he would pick up girls from tinder to cheat on me”.  

And I remained in that mind-set for two weeks after his first Tinder message. Until one night, I came back late from work, exhausted, but after dinner, there it was again; the message notification, three of them, one right after the other… all three from tinder, from a sender named “KT”. And that was it; I lost it. I was infuriated and started shouting at him, asking questions, firmly believing that he was lying to me. For one thing, I was definitely angry at him for exchanging messages with random girls from Tinder, and not even admitting to it. Three messages in a row from a girl on Tinder, wasn’t a conversation starter, it was definitely a response. But on a whole different level, I was angry at myself, and taking it out on him. I was angry at myself for letting him fool me the first time, and for believing his excuses. I was angry at how naïve I was. I recall me shouting at him “stop lying to me!” and him saying “I’m not!” I told him to delete it; he said he would, but he wouldn’t do it right there in front of me. I said, “if you are not replying to them, then show me. Open the message in front of me”, but he wouldn’t. As if I needed that confirmation to know that he was lying.  So when we went to bed that night, I waited for him to get in the shower so that I could go snooping for his phone. I need to stop and clarify here, that I’m not that kind of girl – I respect someone’s privacy and it’s none of my business messing around their phone. But my anger and curiosity took over the best of me that night. He was so good with words, that he almost made me think I’m crazy, even after seeing all those notifications. So I wasn’t going to have it – I’m not a psychotic bitch, I don’t get possessive or jealous, especially without reason. So I needed to prove that to myself. And while all these thoughts were taking over my mind, I suddenly found myself with his phone unlocked (I’ve known the password for months and still didn’t attempt to snoop before that!) and looking at the tinder application on the homepage. I opened it without even giving it another second of thought, and there I was, all of my suspicions confirmed, proving to myself that I’m not crazy: A few minutes before I got home, he had messaged a girl on Tinder: “How is  your evening going? Do you have anything planned? Xx”. And that message was following a long conversation with her, which started days ago – which unfortunately I didn’t have time to read. And there I was with the confirmation in my hands, and waiting for my mind to be put at ease; I wasn’t crazy afterall. But instead, for the first time in my relationship with Serge, I felt cold sweat dripping down my back and a surge of jealousy that was overwhelming.

 I didn’t know how to bring up the conversation again – I couldn’t tell him I snooped around in my phone and I couldn’t tell him one more time “I just know that you are talking with girls, don’t lie to me!” – he would just say I’m crazy. But then again, I couldn’t not talk to him about it. By the time he got out of the shower, I was pacing restlessly around the bedroom, trying to calm myself. Naturally he noticed it, so he asked me “what’s wrong?”, to which I just blurted out “Why are you talking to girls on Tinder? Stop lying to me, I know that you are, just tell me why!” Once again, this led to him denying everything. But there was one thing that he said, which I had to admit he was right: “Look at this place! Your stuff is everywhere, your clothes, make up, accessories; you think I would bring another girl in here with all your stuff around my house?” When this conversation led to yet another fight, and us sleeping in two different rooms, I couldn’t put it off my mind. I kept asking myself why he was chatting to other girls, I kept wondering whether there was something that he wanted, I started doubting myself. I somehow knew that right now he wasn’t sleeping with anyone else, and he wasn’t dating anyone else, not yet at least, but I couldn’t help but wonder: Is he looking for someone new, to start dating and get rid of me as soon as he finds her? Or is chatting to girls on Tinder, merely for an ego boost, something to pass his time and make him feel better about himself? And ultimately, why am I not good enough that he has to go look for other girls? In either case, it all came down to me questioning what I’m doing wrong. With a twenty year age gap, I somehow highly doubted that he was just looking for sex with someone else; but maybe, just maybe, he was looking for someone that he would actually have a future with, in contrast to me. And that scared me, probably more than the fact that he might just be looking for sex. Somehow thinking about it rationally, I knew it was just an ego boost, a way to pass his time when he had nothing better to do and feel better about himself. And that was confirmed, when two days after that, even though the topic wasn’t brought up again, Tinder was gone from his phone.

 I was going to end this post by just drawing the conclusion myself, but this time, I have a definite answer, and it proves me right. A few hours ago, over an early Sunday dinner and a light conversation about dating, I brought up the topic again and half jokingly I said “All men look for an ego boost every now and then. Girls do it too. But I know that’s why you were talking to girls on Tinder”. And this time, for the first time, he didn’t deny it: “Correct, but that’s very rarely, and it’s just a chat. And that’s when I’m with a friend and we just do it as a joke”. I knew there was still a bit of lie in what he said, but he had admitted to it, and I didn’t want to push the topic anymore. I was suddenly more at ease with the idea, and although I don’t particularly like it, I just laughed and told him: “Look, I don’t get why you need an ego boost. You are 42 and you get to fuck a 23 year old, that should be enough of an ego boost”. It made him laugh in agreement; but I didn’t need his approval on that one – I was sure that was true from the very beginning. So I was finally at ease, and even though I don’t like the idea of him looking for an ego boost through pointless conversations with random Tinder girls, I know that at this point, he's content – and that’s enough for now.

 What do you think? Did you ever go through the same experience? How did you deal with your boyfriend chatting to girls on dating websites/applications? 

Speed Dating with

 If your job takes up most of your time and you find it impossible to look for the perfect date on a regular basis, then you are not alone; half of London is in your shoes! Fortunately, there are ways to fit 20 dates in about an hour and a half (given that you can make time for that at least). With the speed and flexibility, lack of awkwardness and convenience that speed dating provides nowadays, it should come as no surprise that I decided to give it another go. This time I chose a different experience with When it comes to speed dating, the relief that comes before the dates is priceless: no long conversations with people you might not like, no awkward silences, no pressure on whether your date will like your outfit – there are more than twenty dates here, someone is bound to love it! Even with the avoidance of the nerve-wrecking anxiousness that comes with first dates, has a lot more to offer during their speed dating events.

  I attended their speed dating event last Friday, at Mahiki in Mayfair. At this point I need to stop and admire the choice of venue! With a wonderful interior, friendly staff and drinks to die for, Mahiki was, in my opinion, the best choice of venue for the event. Upon arrival we were all greeted by the friendliest host, who made sure everyone knew their way around and had a name tag. He was there all along to ensure the event run smoothly and made the last traces of nervousness vanish by a couple of witty jokes. Arrival of participants was at 7.30, which gave us all half an hour before the speed dating started, to mingle and briefly meet all the singletons of the evening. Possibly the most pleasantly striking feature of such events is the wide variety of people you get to meet, of different ages and backgrounds, which makes the conversations ever more interesting. Plus, the great number of people that were at the event (44), meant that you didn’t have to spend a second with anyone you didn’t want to talk to, and it still gave you a pool of people to interact with.

  Before the dating started, everyone was given a card to write down the names of their dates and tick whether they liked them. There was a selection of three boxes to tick: ‘Yes’, ‘No’ and ‘Friend’; giving you a choice of whether you wanted to see that person again and under what conditions! The card also gave a few dating ‘Dos’ and ‘Don’ts’, just in case someone was nervous about what was acceptable to do during dating, as well as a few ice breaker questions, which gave a good push to any conversation that reached a standstill. Once all the ladies were seated, the bachelors started rotating clockwise between the women, spending three minutes at each table. This gave everyone just enough time to get to meet the other person, get a glimpse of their character and decide whether they wanted to meet them again or not! It also didn’t give enough time to interact for a long time with anyone you didn’t want to and the three minutes definitely prevented any potential awkward silences. Of course with some dates, three minutes can seem like an hour and with other it can seem like a second, but either way all is part of a worthwhile experience. A ten minute break was given to all daters halfway through the speed dating, which allowed everyone to get some drinks and mingle some more. This was a good chance to carry on any conversations that were interrupted when time run out during the speed dating. By this time, everyone was more comfortable, all the anxiety had vanished and people were mingling mindlessly making new friends, and potentially new dates!

 After the event had finished, the matches were made without the singletons lifting a finger. The welcoming host collected all the cards and within twelve hours made all the matches and sent an email to all the participants. In the email you get all your matches from the event, both as dates and as friends. And if you happen to log in your account on you can even send them a direct message and start the conversation going… where you left off! Tempted yet? On top of all these, offers these events at the great price of 20 pounds, and a wide variety of events to choose from! But make sure to book your event ASAP, because tickets are running out fast! 

For more information on the events and prices visit:

*This is a sponsored post. Many thanks to for the invitation. All the opinions are my own.